Extra! Extra! Rob has an outline!

In an unbelievable turn of events late this afternoon, Rob produced an outline for his dissertation proposal. I repeat, Rob now has an outline for his dissertation proposal. Apparently he has even committed to a methodology and a student population from which he will draw his sample.

Normally in solitary confinement in his office all weekend long, we were fortunate to see him today in his front yard, covering up plants before tonight's late-April frost:

Yeah, it just kinda came to me this afternoon, somewhere between the dozen Hershey's kisses and the banana I ate around 4:30 PM. The good Guatemalan coffee helped out quite a bit as well. It's good that we're all out of Girl Scout Cookies, or else I'd have been a goner.

Aw man, I guess I have to actually write this f-cker now, huh?!

Stay tuned to this channel for more breaking news of this historic and unexpected turn of events, a whole three days before the draft is due.